Agust.

I wondered why the fire had been started in my heart.  that one year.  the music was both the embers and the glow.

To each his own.  Funny, isn't it, how my gaze had not stayed for long on any?  I was-was I not?-continually drawn AWAY.  What was it about this time?  Surely the others could be viewed as accomplices.

I never meant to..I simply meant to be wholesome, intelligent, and quite quite witty.

Farewell, I had said, to my heart's desires.  Bless his soul.  Surely he was the one.  I loved him.  Agape love.

I love him still.  What if my fingers ran dull and for me there was no tomorrow?  Or if tomorrow for him was a better tomorrow, filled with roses of the best quality and seeing people in dresses walk past with no hope in his mind of a ring on my finger?

If you keep listening, I will listen too. Fine qualities of sound.  Do you not know that each tendril of hair, each object mine eyes glimpse, every sound I made, every desire my heart invisibly whispered (or ached so loud anyone who looked carefully enough would see) were as the notes of a masterful classical composition?

Piano, where my heart had weeped over the no more body of that one soul.  But such is loss.  It gives you no more than it takes.  I wished for another to take her place in the manner of teaching this art and of talking this art and of listening to me be this art and of giving this art to me.  Then we could bond as friends and no more evade each others' existences, pretending the others' feet not walk the ground in tender humility and soft conscience before God.  For such were our hearts and lives.  And it was to always be that way, said of our hearts, that they walked with that tender humility and soft conscience before God.

To be honest, I wanted a living room. with.  to be.

Just one more song?  Why did you stop?

Go to the next song.  If it was the Lord.  I don't want to be too trusting of what my mind just thought, lest ye smite me with a stone saying I said that which He didn't say.  oh, tomorrow's song was only followed by Agust, not tomorrow's song, and Lag Fyrir Ommu by myself.  I served the Lord by prayer in that moment.  The next song didn't come, the next song didn't come!!!  Why?!?!