a journal from april.
I know that there are a lot of messes to clean in the house, but it's late and I'm listening to Prophetic Ministry in the End Times by IHOP.
I want to be pure in heart, but I am the farthest from that. I see my own inconsistencies, and they are not 'perfect imperfections.' They are beasts, howling and tearing at those around me. I wish for so much but knowledge does not take me far in life.
The disorder in my life is not because of others. It is because of MYSELF. My faults are not others' faults. I am such a fallen creature, my dust flies far when I fall.
an arrogant smile has definitely been mine.
offenses have been my burden to bear the knowledge that I have borne to others.
the humans i so dearly love would so clearly see my impurities, my glaring indifference to their point of view.
I am not wise to know and not put to action. It is only wise to apply that knowledge.
Wishing that I could be a better person.
Trying to be thankful, be graceful. To not let honesty supercede love.//
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