"A lady must be gentle by nature and rearing. She must know all there is to learn from books, have wide experience to cover all emergencies, she must be steeped in social graces and diplomatic by nature. She must rise unruffled to any emergency, never wound, never offend, always help and heal. She must be perfect in deportment, virtue, wifehood and motherhood. She must be graceful, pleasing, and beautiful. She must perfect herself in learning, arts, and graces. She must always be refined in appearance, actions, and speech."
Gene Stratton Porter

"i listened while you ran yourself in circles. it saddened my soul to hear this string of fallacies uttered in such a sincere voice. your entire life is comprised of mashed up, tie-dyed morals and ideologies. your whole philosophy is paper thin. your world operates without regard to truth and logic. you’ve whisked together erroneous information to create a world that makes you happy. that which is crooked is straight and that which is meaningless brings you peace. i wonder, in your world, do our cappuccinos even taste the same? your eyes sparkle as you sit and wait for me to speak after your marathon. you have no idea of the maelstrom within my chest as my soul weeps, oh God, give me words."
-andie jael haugen {cloudno9.tumblr.com}
how sad and empty.  thank God for the HOPE we have in Christ!

The Joys of Today:

the light peep through the windows
seeing a man smiling while at church
rest and rejuvenation
funny remembrances
holy songs
renewal from the Father
grey socks
grandma's love
tumblr
AND holiness and purity

Homeless Man

God saved my new friend, a homeless man, just last week on Friday morning!  This precious homeless man believed in Jesus, was saved by God, and became a believer inside the Starbucks on the corner of King and Main in Madison, Wisconsin, right in view of the gorgeous capitol building.  Little did I know when I walked in that Starbucks with a group of believers that would we walk out with him, holding the door for us like a gentleman, now a new believer, one of us.  Can't wait to see him again!

King and 

Before We Ever Met

[written in hopes of a person I do not know becoming a believer]

Today I asked my Father
For the recipe of a delicious meal
In which
Some lost item becomes found (and you are the lost item)

You are the one I want to randomly meet,
To become the dough
To become rounded by the Maker's hand
To be un-graced transformed to grace

I look forward to the whimsical day when
I run into you,
Eyes all aglow
And I know

You were made for eternity

An eternity starting today with
A conversation
That I'm not scared to have
And neither are you

You know I have to tell you something you need to know
And I know I need to tell you something you need to know
So we speak and you hear
And we hug and we cry

It's not make-believe
It's request become true
I love being with you and you with I
The moment is better than the poem

You're an organic sinner
Let me wash the dirt off you
And place you somewhere nice and hot
So you can be added to this recipe of the body of Christ

It's delicious.
The basil.
The tomato.
The wheat.

Love found you because God is love and...

Love had a purpose
For your existence
A meal now, a word, a soft tender look
Because now we're together, you and I

In the body of Christ.

{picture source: awelltraveledwoman.tumblr.com}

Update

When everything is just a contradiction, what do we do?
Should I just spill my heart?  I believe that although it may be hard and although my sin may be obvious (oh, how sad!) or that it's just something a lot of people already obviously have in their lives, I am called to confess my sin to fellow believers and I will be healed.  Oh, I've been on the computer when I should set it aside.  I apologize to the world, to everyone, to God, to my family, for wasting time on the computer, time that belonged to Jesus.
What am I supposed to do with my life?  Though this still may remain a question, did not God say to seek His face, to look to Him for all the answers?  The funny thing is that it is completely untrue that I don't know what to do with my life.  Sometimes it's been a statement used just because at that moment I didn't share the complete truth and my honesty.  Oh, forgive me Lord, please!  What a creature I am who needs NEEDS NEEDS His mercy.  I just want it to flow down on me like a waterfall.  His love is like that.  It washes away my imperfections!  Is there somewhere God wants me to be and I simply need to listen to His voice?  Are my desires compatable with Jesus's?
Hidden meanings, hidden meanings...What will come out of my heart?  Horridness?  When all I want to be and know I should be is vague.  Missing out.  I don't want that.  I'm tired of being a Pharisee.  I must not, by God's grace, be one who longs for the praise of man but misses out on love.
When you're just so sick and tired of yourself...
When you're just so sick and tired of being sick and tired....
Then God breaks through.
When you're so obsessed with perfection that it just has to come but that it makes life hard to live.
I wish my heart was more beautiful.  I wish my heart burst with God's beauty and love, shining ever brighter till the full light of day.
Am I being seen as just like the people I've been praying for so long to know Jesus?  Oh, may that not be so.  No more.  I am called to live in such a way that no one can find anything wrong with me!
When God calls you and you don't respond....Lord, let this not even be implied of your people.
How do I find life?  Do I forsake everything I "wanted" for what I really want and then somehow have everything I'll ever need and do all the things God wants me to do?
To know that God loves me is a transformational factor in life.  It gives me the strength to not stand with the wicked (forgiven I am!), to be firm in righteousness, and to be full of faith.  God's love helps me to love others.
The wreckage of this world that I must escape is set in such a manner that I have to truly believe and stand by faith.  I must stop living in such a manner as claiming that as my inheritance!  My portion is God!  That is supernaturally natural.
I stand by faith, pushing aside all the surrounding trees, to see before me what is of God and what is of faith.  I push them aside, and I see by faith, by hope, a safe haven of rest.
Psalm 107:30  They were glad when it grew calm, and he guided them to their desired haven.

A Wise Young Woman

A wise young woman marries the man who is living a purposeful life and who has vision from the Lord.  She marries a provider, a protector, a righteous man.  She lives as a servant to the man who covers her with prayer, who leads her as the Holy Spirit does, and who loves as Christ does.

A Father's Heart

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eDNXEbvpRD4